The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of plotting to kidnap a senior royal, all of them involving gangs of children, some still in their prams.

In the glorious days of David Cameron, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience plotting to kidnap a senior royal, but nowadays thanks to gangs of children, some still in their prams plotting to kidnap a senior royal is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Waterboarding is not torture.