The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that defacing statues in Trafalgar Square is becoming ever more common, then we learn that Guardian-reading do-gooders are pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack Guardian-reading do-gooders pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals was Mr I.P.Freely of Tunbridge Wells who today said I like sponge.