The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of setting fire to libraries, all of them involving bleeding heart liberals.

In the glorious days of Richard Littlejohn, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience setting fire to libraries, but nowadays thanks to bleeding heart liberals setting fire to libraries is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is If only we had a privitised National Identity scheme this would never have happened.