Guardian-reading do-gooders have been holding illegal raves illegally in illegal fields the Mail can exclusively reveal.

How long can this political correctness gone mad be tolerated by British people?

Lala from the teletubbies said of Guardian-reading do-gooders, "A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for?"

Guardian-reading do-gooders made no comment about the accusations when we didn’t ask.