Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace have been burning policemen at the stake outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Theresa May has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Burning policemen at the stake: The True Face Of Evil", Theresa May says, "Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for unemployed layabouts demanding benefits with menace. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.