With schools turning out a generation of illiterate hoodlums, crime threatening our every movement and a Government that treats criminals with kid gloves rather than forcibly immasculating them, is it any wonder that, once more Guardian-reading do-gooders have been selling heroin to the unions?

What is needed is some very serious discipline. We can beat sense into Guardian-reading do-gooders - all it takes is a little British spunk, some backbone and a big stick.

Instead sickos, perverts and communists are allowed to crawl the streets with impunity. Selling heroin to the unions must no longer be tolerated, especially when perpetrated by Guardian-reading do-gooders.

Speaking exclusively to the Mail about Guardian-reading do-gooders, Beyonce said "Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts.".