Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy have been burning policemen at the stake outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Boris Johnson has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Burning policemen at the stake: The True Face Of Evil", Boris Johnson says, "surely something can be done?".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.