Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. The Unions have been setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack outside nursery schools.

Terror expert The Queen has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack: The True Face Of Evil", The Queen says, "make no mistake if this is allowed to continue Armageddon shall surely be upon us and woe betide all who would seek to impose upon us a surveillance society. For on that day the right shall inherit the Earth!".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for the Unions. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.