Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of selling drugs to schoolchildren for fun has been perpetrated by Islamist youths.

The Mail can reveal that Islamist youths are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

The English People said of the Islamist youths, "I think hanging is too good for them; Its time to consider the reintroduction of crucifiction, especially for criminals.".