The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that causing cancer is becoming ever more common, then we learn that asylum seekers are selling heroin to the unions every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack asylum seekers selling heroin to the unions was Lala from the teletubbies who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..