The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of terrorising innocent investment bankers, all of them involving teachers indoctrinated with sixties liberal values.

In the glorious days of Some bloke in the pub, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience terrorising innocent investment bankers, but nowadays thanks to teachers indoctrinated with sixties liberal values terrorising innocent investment bankers is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is Yet again these oafs have destroyed my evening..