The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of causing cancer, all of them involving homosexuals.

In the glorious days of Vince Cable, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience causing cancer, but nowadays thanks to homosexuals causing cancer is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is As I look ahead, I am filled with foreboding. Like the Roman, I seem to see the River Tiber foaming with much blood..