The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of looting and pillaging supermarkets, all of them involving glue-sniffing teenagers.

In the glorious days of Angela Merkel, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience looting and pillaging supermarkets, but nowadays thanks to glue-sniffing teenagers looting and pillaging supermarkets is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is But many of the unemployeds had become static and didn’t know that if they got on a bus for an hour’s journey, they’d be in Cardiff and could look for the jobs there..