Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of binge drinking on council estates has been perpetrated by Jeremy Corbyn admirers.

The Mail can reveal that Jeremy Corbyn admirers are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

Jacob Rees-Mogg said of the Jeremy Corbyn admirers, "we are coming slowly, painfully to an autumn of understanding, I hope it will be followed by a winter of common sense.".