The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that fighting the poilce is becoming ever more common, then we learn that hooligans are injecting crack into the kneecaps of innocent passers by every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack hooligans injecting crack into the kneecaps of innocent passers by was The deputy commisioner of the Metropolitan Police who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..