Conservative head office has today said "A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for?".

Speaking at Alton Towers Conservative head office’s comments come in a week that has seen Guardian-reading do-gooders involved in plotting to kidnap a senior royal on an ever more frequent basis.

Conservative head office’s comments are both brave and perceptive. In a country where children as young as five are regularly exposed to Guardian-reading do-gooders it is about time that someone had the guts to stand up and tell the truth. Guardian-reading do-gooders and the liberal communist atheist society that spawns them must be eliminated.