The Mail has learned that ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy are responsible for using skateboards and yobbish language to molest journalists.

Has the world gone mad? Ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy are using skateboards and yobbish language to molest journalists with impunity. Hanging is surely too good for these no good scum. Why doesn’t the Government use all the money it has stolen from the hardworking families of Britain in stealth taxes to make amends for the situation. Probably because they are too busy lining their pockets!

The Mail spoke to Jim Davidson, who said "A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for?"