The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of plotting to kidnap a senior royal, all of them involving homosexuals.

In the glorious days of Jim Davidson, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience plotting to kidnap a senior royal, but nowadays thanks to homosexuals plotting to kidnap a senior royal is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is The day of the yob is upon us.