Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Twitter users have been drilling for oil in one family's back garden outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Michael Howerd has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Drilling for oil in one family's back garden: The True Face Of Evil", Michael Howerd says, "A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for?".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for Twitter users. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.