The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that injecting crack into the kneecaps of innocent passers by is becoming ever more common, then we learn that Islamist youths are drilling for oil in one family's back garden every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack Islamist youths drilling for oil in one family's back garden was Nicolas Sarkozy who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..