Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of getting away with arson has been perpetrated by Jeremy Corbyn admirers.

The Mail can reveal that Jeremy Corbyn admirers are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

George Osborne said of the Jeremy Corbyn admirers, "was it for this politically correct insanity that I fought and died in eight world wars? I think not!".