The Mail has learned that ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy are responsible for ripping off hard working families.

Has the world gone mad? Ravers smashed out of their tiny minds on ecstasy are ripping off hard working families with impunity. Hanging is surely too good for these no good scum. Why doesn’t the Government use all the money it has stolen from the hardworking families of Britain in stealth taxes to make amends for the situation. Probably because they are too busy lining their pockets!

The Mail spoke to Conservative head office, who said "We need a lot less of the passive tolerance of recent years and much more active, muscular liberalism. Especially for the blacks."