Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Twitter users have been ripping off hard working families outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Beyonce has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Ripping off hard working families: The True Face Of Evil", Beyonce says, "A large proportion of Britain’s Asian population fail to pass the cricket test. Which side do they cheer for?".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for Twitter users. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.