Conservative head office has today said "yet again these oafs have destroyed my evening.".

Speaking at Alton Towers Conservative head office’s comments come in a week that has seen yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps involved in smashing up images of our queen of hearts, Lady Diana herself on an ever more frequent basis.

Conservative head office’s comments are both brave and perceptive. In a country where children as young as five are regularly exposed to yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps it is about time that someone had the guts to stand up and tell the truth. Yobs wearing hoodies and baseball caps and the liberal communist atheist society that spawns them must be eliminated.