Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of injecting crack into the kneecaps of innocent passers by has been perpetrated by youths.

The Mail can reveal that youths are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

The Queen said of the youths, "these dole-scrounging n’er-do-wells must be eliminated at all costs.".