The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of causing obesity, all of them involving Eastern European terror gangs.

In the glorious days of Winston Churchill, speaking through a medium, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience causing obesity, but nowadays thanks to Eastern European terror gangs causing obesity is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is We are coming slowly, painfully to an autumn of understanding, I hope it will be followed by a winter of common sense..