Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Bleeding heart liberals have been plotting to kidnap a senior royal outside nursery schools.

Terror expert Nick Clegg has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Plotting to kidnap a senior royal: The True Face Of Evil", Nick Clegg says, "these dole-scrounging n’er-do-wells must be eliminated at all costs.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for bleeding heart liberals. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.