In a shocking indictment of our permissive society it has this week emerged that bleeding heart liberals have been pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals.

Things have gone too far. Its bad enough that we tolerate the spicy food and loud music of bleeding heart liberals without allowing them to terrorise decent, middle class families as well.

The Mail will be starting a campaign against bleeding heart liberals and we promise our readers now that we shall not rest until each one of them is hunted down like a dog. Margaret Thatcher speaking in support of our campaign said "Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets.".

Have things gone too far? Have your say on our webshite!