The horror or Broken Britain continues this week.

First we learn that drilling for oil in one family's back garden is becoming ever more common, then we learn that enviro-Mental-ists are engaging in steamy sex romps every day.

Among the hardworking Britons to attack enviro-Mental-ists engaging in steamy sex romps was Vince Cable who today said Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets..