The Daily Mail has learned, by imagining them, of literally BILLIONS of incidents of injecting crack into primary school children, all of them involving criminal gangs from Eastern Europe.

In the glorious days of George Osborne, no hardworking family of Britain would expect to experience injecting crack into primary school children, but nowadays thanks to criminal gangs from Eastern Europe injecting crack into primary school children is an everyday occurence.

Frankly, the only thing that any sane person can say is As I look ahead, I am filled with foreboding. Like the Roman, I seem to see the River Tiber foaming with much blood..