Why, Oh Why, Oh Why do we allow insane Brussels bureaucrats such freedom? Not only are they probably communists, but insane Brussels bureaucrats have this week been revealed as setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack.

If only the Government and the guacomole-munchers of Islington were a little less concerned with helping Johnny-foreigner and a little more concerned with the rights of the hard working majority of our glorious Nation, then perhaps insane Brussels bureaucrats would not get away with such treachery.

That certainly seems to be the opinion of Norris McWhirter, speaking posthumously who this week said, "a glorious thousand-year reich seems like the only practical choice to stem the tide of economic migrants".

So, next time you are at a dinner party and the menu involves sun dried tomatoes, just consider whether you think that setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack is acceptable behaviour.