Shocking news has come to light that a recent spate of smoking skunk in the halls of Parliament has been perpetrated by Al Qu’aeda bosses.

The Mail can reveal that Al Qu’aeda bosses are actually not human at all but have been spawned in Europe by a bureaucrat known as Saruman who intends to wrest control of all that is good and decent using this army of misfits.

A hardworking family said of the Al Qu’aeda bosses, "I grew up in the 1930s with an unemployed father. He did not riot. He got on his bike and looked for work, and he went on looking until he found it.".