Now children are openly being encouraged to flout the laws of morality and the land. Noam Chomsky devotees have been setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack outside nursery schools.

Terror expert A hardworking family has analysed the phenomenon in a new book which we certainly aren’t plugging although it is available from our bookshop for just £7.99; a fantastic 1.7% discount.

In "Setting fire to pensioners whilst high on skunk and crack: The True Face Of Evil", A hardworking family says, "Its the terrorists fault. Watch my eyes. Te-rror-ists. Now I can say anything I like and you’ll think it makes sense somehow. Brilliant. Te-rror-is-ts.".

A decent "Big Society" that cared about children would bring back hanging for Noam Chomsky devotees. After the hanging the still twitching bodies would be deported to somewhere tropical and foreign.