I’m not racist but surely allowing cyber criminals to flout our British way of life means that things have gone too far? Pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals is just not British.

Some leftists will predictably argue that cyber criminals aren’t pleasuring themselves on the alters of our great cathedrals in reality. But reality has a well known left-wing bias. Angela Merkel agrees with me, saying today, "Things got out of hand and we’d had a few drinks. We smashed the place up and Boris set fire to the toilets.".

Let’s kick out the sickos and reclaim our traditional British heritage.